Hello, friends, family members, disturbed future employers, and, most importantly, hordes of adoring fans. I am pleased to inform you that I will be logging my training once more, much to all of your delight. It was a travesty to leave all of you hanging for these months and I truly regret that. I humbly beseech your pardon with the hope that the unique opportunity to read more about me and my training invites the spirit of forgiveness into your hearts. My fearless escapade into the mystery of distance running has been beleaguered with issues. Let's start where I left off: In the summer, reportedly feeling "off" on my training runs, as I informed my millions (billions, perhaps?) of worried readers. My mileage surged like the powerful Ganges River during the great monsoons of India. I reached a peak of 60 miles a week that, were I less sophisticated, I would deem "whopping". I prefer the word "tremendous" for such a feat, considering I had struggled to reach 50 since sophomore year, barely attaining that mark at last by the end of senior year. Zealously adherent to the perscribed training program graciously granted to me by Coach Walter Drenth of the Institution of the State of Michigan, I, with tremendous mileage in hand, began "cookin," as those with inferior vernacular to one such as myself would state. A man of high standing and intellect, which I certainly am, would choose a term such as "flourishing". Whilst flourishing in the early stages of my career at the institute, many fast runners had the privilege of being joined by me in their workout group, including my esteemed roommate, Morgan. I achieved a 5k PR on a course, the likes of which yields few 5k PRs. However, I was stricken by the ailment known as mono just before my first 8k, in which I subsequently fell flat. Crippled, devastated, and removed from training, my body fought this terrible disease for three weeks. Three long, horrific, and hard-fought weeks. However, there truly is good in this world, and your hero prevailed and emerged from the fire only kind of scathed. He now diligently pursues recovery along an infuriatingly slow, conservative progression and hopes for the day that he may be cookin' once more. Until next time, loyal readers.
Forever your idol and role model,
If you read all that, props. I'm not sure anybody will. I certainly wouldn't. After all, this training log is for me, not for you. How selfish of you to think that it was for you!